How Long Since You Had A Tantrum?

Here’s a way to have this fun experience and more.


While tantrums are usually associated with children’s confronting uncontrollable anger or frustration, having a tantrum on purpose can be a great liberating experience for an adult.

Here’s a tip: Do this when you are alone at home without being inhibited by family and when you feel that existence is a sad slog, or your life is undergoing a torrent of experiences you can’t control. In other words, a tantrum may erase a bummed-out feeling.

Ruthy Alon, a disciple of Moshe Feldenkrais, creator of the Feldenkrais Method, describes how to do it. The Method encourages gentle, mindful movement to bring new awareness and possibility into every aspect of your life.

First, lie down on the floor, with or without a pillow under your head. I do it without because I feel it gives my head a chance to line itself up with my spine.

You can also do this while seated in a chair or lying on your bed.

Start by bending your knees to make your feet flat on the floor, about hip-width apart, arms down the sides of your torso. Then start to move your right foot up and down as if you were walking.

Stop that and switch to the left foot with the same up and down movement, then alternate from one foot to another. Leave your legs in this position, resting.

Next, move your right forearm and hand up and down. Position your hands in soft fists. Do this about five times. Then do the other side the same way. Now, start moving your entire right arm and shoulder, up and down a few times, and then the left side. Alternate the right and left sides.

Now, gently turn your head to the right and left without lifting it.

Now, you’re ready.

Start to move everything, arms, legs, and rolling your head all at the same time. Increase your speed to frantic and at the same time shout, “No, No, No” for as long as you like. You’ll get the gist of this right away. Take a rest, and when your ready, do it again, this time shout, “Yes, Yes, Yes.”

I liked “No, No, No” better than “Yes, Yes, Yes .” It released a load of pent-up anger.

You’ve done it. You’ve had a tantrum. How do you feel?


Here‘s another unique way to relieve stress. MICHAEL BIAS, ARTISTIC/PRODUCING DIRECTOR, my acting coach/teacher, described this path.

Pick a color. Any color will do.

Sit comfortably in a chair and imagine that this color fills your body, starting from your head. Feel the color as it fills your forehead, face, neck, shoulders, down your arms to your fingertips. The color moves slowly, so don’t rush.

It continues filling your chest, abdomen, pelvis, down your legs to your littlest toes. Rest there for a few minutes allowing yourself to luxuriate in this color. You are no longer just you; now you are a color radiating love, magnificence, and a richness absent before.

Next, imagine that a small hole has opened in your toe, and the color slowly starts to leave you. First, your head and face return to how they usually feel, and gradually, slowly, your whole body is being reborn. You are at rest, peaceful, calm, and ready to tackle a challenge.

You can do both of these exercises. Even if they are out of your regular range of activity, you’ll find they are rewarding. Be fearless and daring. The result will be worth it.

In May 2021, I celebrated my 89th B’day, and have been writing a blog each week for the past year. I learned more about myself than I expected. What a journey!